I was having a splendid conversation with
one Dcknight, winger Nondies RFC, about ‘chips funga’ and it got me thinking
about the kind of friends that we keep. I mean, “ Show me your friends and I
will tell you who you are”.
I have those girlfriends that are always
there for me, regardless of whether we meet often or just have coffee once
every three months. After all, we are at that stage where everyone is trying to
figure out who she will become, and what she will be doing for the rest of her
life. So am comfortable with those five pots of coffee every three months at a
local café.
I have another set of girlfriends that are
more frequent and just as loyal as the first. They tend to be a backbone and
are always there when I need them for fun or just to talk to. They are more
reserved with the kind of people I associate with, and will never fail to tell
me when the man I have picked is as simple as, “Uyo ako down”.
Going out with them is the perfect, why?
There is always the watchdog to prevent the rest of the pod, yes I said it pod,
from getting “scooped”. Awesome. The fact is, when we are together we are so
compatible and well entertained that we need not any other species to help us
enjoy ourselves. This is the kind of pod that you can as well drink till you
drop. Be sure that you will get home safely, and wake up in your nightdress,
almost as if you went to bed by yourself.
I am sure you know about those girlfriends
that are good to party with but you become the watchdog; I do that a number of
times. You are very afraid that if both of you get too drunk then hell will
break loose. These are also the ones that depend on the pod for the drinks,
they will insist on getting the 750ml bottle because they know it will keep
them going all through the night. They never get ‘chips funguad’ at least not
with you, but will get much of the attention from the crowd around. Your night
is characterised by, “pole amelewa and wacha ujinga” but you end up having a real laugh and great memories, and meet
new people. You will also get some free drinks from the guys she decided to “chokoza” and then run away. These girlfriends have their own level of
standards that only they can explain.
The bad girl friends are those that depend
on other parties to help them get to autopilot. This acclaimed “divas” will
dress up and go to the club with their 150 bob, purchase a black-ice or better
yet a Guarana or king fisher, sip it for three hours while trying to seduce a
fellow from the crowd. Now you, or rather me, her sidekick, is forced to
indulge and talk to the fellow’s friend. It is only the two of you at the
table; others are getting to know each other through bend over and daggering.
Living the club is scheduled for 6 am, as the last four hours were spent on the
phone trying to figure out where the leader of your pod had gone. Let us just
guess!
If you are a pretty girl am sure you have
those friends that will push you to a fellow, insist how they are familiar with
the guy and even pace set the conversation for you. They may think you are a
bore and getting you occupied with an old guy with a Merc X at the parking is
the best way to enjoy the night. They will insist you over indulge taking shots
and downing drinks in seconds, to prepare you for the feast you are going to
partake, as they enjoy their drinks filling the table. She must accompany you to the bathroom
to ensure you come back to the Merc X-ian table for her to be filled with the
drinks and the foods she only dreams of. Her words are more often than not, “
Take one for the team.” We all know what that one is…with the old guy. Lust!
Those are the ones that I know; feel free
to add any you have encountered. Open your eyes ladies and see it as it is…
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